To Know

It can be easy to get caught up in life and feel the need to know everything. Somehow we tend to elevate ourselves on dangerously higher pedestals within our own minds to meet these grand expectations of knowing how to live life without flaw. At least for me personally I have had to ask the Lord for forgiveness for this way of living because this expectation of myself and the pride behind thinking I know how to meet all of what life brings within my own strength, separates me from Him. I become free and less weighted down when I can say, “I do not know how to do this. Can you help guide me?”

There is so much beauty in humility.

“To know” the ins and outs of life often comes with acknowledging that we are not the experts. We must come and ask God for strength and wisdom. Too many times we believe the lie that we have to know all the answers and know how to do all the things. It is not a bad thing to not know. In fact, not knowing is the perfect set up to know God. As we allow Him into everything we do in life, we can rest assured that He knows and we do not. A load can be lifted off of our shoulders.

If you are struggling to know how to parent, love your spouse, work, and navigate these crazy times full of masks and heated opinions, you are perfectly set up for a great victory. Because God knows and understands our weaknesses He is ready and waiting to help.

Humble living invites His loving support and strong yet gentle hands to guide us. If you feel frazzled today, you are in the perfect position for God to come and bring peace. It is okay to not know and it is okay to not feel okay. God knows and Has the best solutions.

He is ready and waiting. Are you?

Faithful

(He is faithful to my family)



It can be easy to get caught up in what has been lost or stolen at any time of our life. There is a time to grieve and mourn. If you are in a time of mourning whether due to the virus or other life events… ⁣



Maybe your business is suffering or you’ve lost your job. Perhaps someone has passed away or this quarantine schedule is wearing you thin. Maybe you continue to wait for breakthrough in your health or other circumstances and it is a struggle to see right now.⁣



All of you. Everyone! I will shout this, whisper it to your heart and speak it for the rest of my life: God is faithful! He is faithful! His steadfast love endures forever! (Psalm 136)⁣


You may not be able to see it right now but blessings are coming your way (double blessings!). His strength is for you today! His joy is yours today. His peace is for right now. He is for you! ⁣


Do not blame him for the tyranny of this virus. Do not blame him for the loss. Blame the devil and then tell him where to go because he is losing and has lost… Celebrate the victory. Because no matter what evil may come to try to tear us apart it will not prevail. ⁣



God is faithful! He always has been faithful and always will be.

Will You Listen?

I have a story to tell but I am sworn to silence.

I want to tell you of heaven and hell and how I’ve experienced both.

I have a story to tell. I am told to lie and that I am to blame.

I experience heartbreak after heartbreak as my voice gets thrown under the rug. Other people tell me that my life is fine. I come and go believing that others can take from me however they desire. I have been ground down to nothing. Is it no wonder I don’t know who I am? Is it no wonder that I just stare blankly instead of scream when sex and nudity is the norm? After all, I am told I get to choose who I am so this is just helping me decide. Words that cut like knives and clothes that cover bruises is what I am told is okay. Sexual education is taught in the bedroom, in the living room and on my phone. This is okay because I get to choose my sex and this is called parenting.

When I come up to the light no one comes to save me.

Who will be my voice and speak up for me? Who will show me I am worth it?

I have a story to tell, now set me free so that I can speak it or shout it if I want to.

I am tired of these chains holding me down. Set me free and I will run to safety.

I have a story to tell. I will only utter the words of darkness so you will know that Heaven gave me my freedom instead of the world.

I have a story to tell.

Will you listen?

The Peace Within. Do You Have It?

Are you anxious about anything?

The past several years could have easily been years full of anxiety and sleepless nights. The more that difficulties have come the more that peace settles in my soul. I didn’t used to be this way. Anxiety used to rule my day and caused many sleepless nights. Fears used to dominate everything I did.

Not anymore.

Peace resides in my spirit. I still grapple with injustice. I will never understand evil acts against those I love. I have to process through every stage of grief. Some days I don’t want to get out of bed after a long day fighting for precious ones. But peace resides within me. It is the reason I can and will get out of bed. I trust God. He knows my name and cares about the ones I love more than I do.

I know that the mighty Lions roar of justice and victory is coming.

What do you need prayer for? What victory are you waiting on God to help bring? Please write in the comment section or send a message to me directly and I will pray for each one.

Roar of Justice

My little family of 3 is worth trudging through the mud for!

Due to our current dynamics (other blended families can relate) we often face ongoing challenges that require a good lifestyle of forgiveness, self-control, patience, joy, peace, kindness, goodness & love. Oh wait, you mean all families should require that too? Uh… Yeah!

Exclusion and slander have become just a normal thing we face on a regular basis (sadly by multiple people). The unfortunate part about this is that our daughter is the one that pays for it. I want to write a book about all of the ways that kids are getting damaged by selfish, deceitful adults who exclude, lie and slander those whose intentions are pure… So stayed tuned for several years about how selfish adults actions affect the next generation & ways to reverse the damage (insert wink emoji here for added light hearted effect which won’t work anyways).

I have reached a point where just pretending to put a smile on my face around these people is not good enough anymore. If you know anything about me I have always struggled when things are not complete, are not reconciled & when injustices continue to occur. I have also come to the realization that I have at times unknowingly partnered with the thief by just sitting back and allowing a heavy cloak of the wrong identity to be placed on me that was never mine. Consider this post a step to break free from the ongoing bondage I unknowingly partnered with.

Is my family worth it? Yes!

Will I continue to attempt to ensure that my family will be included and given time together that they deserve? Yes, just with a different attempt & with those that are in our lives to lift us up. I have every right to protect and guard those I love especially my own husband and daughter.

Here is to victory after victory!

Here is to triumph after triumph!

Hear the roar of justice! He is coming.

Winter is about to end.

Don’t Be Boring

I have never wanted to live a boring life.

Boring is over-rated. Boring does not leave a legacy that births revivals and love. Boring changes nothing. Boring leaves stagnant waste and leaves people questioning purpose rather than living abundantly in love.

I would rather live my life having given every breath to speak words of truth & love.

I would rather die knowing I chose an adventurous life with Jesus and gave my all to him. Are dead people rising from the dead? Are you seeing the light return in the eyes of those you spend time with even in the line in the grocery store?

When impossible becomes normal and the possible becomes mundane that is when you know you are truly living. It is exhilarating.

Don’t be boring.

Be different.

Choose the Jesus adventure & you will realize that in surrender you gain an epic life.

Do It Again

2018 is on the horizon and I have many things on my mind. I have spent 2017 forgiving many, loving fiercely and surrendering my soul to my mighty God. There are many questions I have and many prayers I’m waiting for the Lord to answer. 

He has done great things for my heart, my soul & for my family. He has delivered me from pain & healed my body. He has set me free.

My biggest question going into 2018 is, “Will you do it again?” 

Every day for the past week and a half I have asked God this question. I have wept and I have spent hours into the night interceding for my family. There is so much on my heart that I cannot give up hope believing will happen. 

I have spent my time watching the boxing scene in Rocky where he did not win that battle but he put up one good fight & remained standing. This is 2017. 

2018 will be the year I see God do it again. I will go back in that boxing ring and win! It will be my year full of laughter & joy. 

I have listened to this song every day for the past week and a half. It has been my anthem. God is good. He is faithful. ⬇

“Do It Again” Elevation Worship

Enemy Slaying & Justice

Several weeks ago a certain part of my life was met with some serious confrontation. It began with the injustices over certain things happening with my daughter. I remember dropping her off after having a full two weeks together. When we made it home I cried myself to sleep. I love my girl so much & the battle she endures tears my heart up inside.

The following weeks I began praying differently. I was filled with boldness & confidence knowing God wants justice. And all of a sudden it hit me. I didn’t believe God wanted justice for me. This realization hit me so hard that it almost felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. I grieved the fact that for the majority of my life I did not know my worth. For years I allowed people to treat me awful, always with the thought that it was my fault. I figured that since they said I was to blame that it must be true.

Be careful who you listen to. Be careful the ones you allow to sow things into your soul. 

It can be hard when those in your life that are supposed to love & care for your heart fail miserably. When it comes down to who matters, Gods opinion of you is the only one that will have eternal impact. 

Several days ago I was able to have a pep talk with my daughter. I told her that just because important people in her life place conditions on their love for her & treat her awful does not & will never decrease her value. Her value only increases. She is priceless. Because of Jesus she is able to know that her value is not & will never be dependent on other people loving her back the way she needs them to in return. God has her back. With God she gets better with time just like fine wine & in that case her value increases everyday no matter who neglects or abuses her.

The day I shared this with her was also a reminder of the enemy slaying I had just done the weeks before.

Therefore, this summer has been an epic one, slaying the enemy left & right! 

Justice. 

Justice for my daughter.

Justice for my husband.

Justice for me (I finally believe it)!

Working Through Scar Tissue

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(Hannah Hope Photography)

Last week I tore some scar tissue in my wrist from an injury dating back to middle school. I heard a pop and had immediate pain. Like many times in the past where I had inflamed the same injury I instantly was worried. I soon realized that this pain was different and minor soreness occurred. I now have better movement and range of motion than I have ever had in years.

When God is allowed into our lives deeper and deeper, he starts to break up our scar tissue.

Scar tissue is an amazing thing as it is our body’s way of repairing and protecting the damaged area. Sometimes it can build up too much and we need it to be worked out in order for proper blood flow to return to the area and life can return back as it should be.

Our hearts, minds, and souls are very much the same. We do things to repair and protect ourselves when we have been hurt. But too often we can either run or see it as a bad thing when our inner scar tissue begins to break up and be worked out. It feels uncomfortable. It can be extremely painful at the time. It leaves us feeling vulnerable. Sometimes it can even feel too intrusive. This is a good thing!

I have seen too many people in my life run from these moments. Just when God is getting to the root of the cause of so much of our pain, we run. Just when God is getting to the root of our sin issue, we run. No one really likes pain but when there is pain with a purpose, a purpose to bring healing and life back so that we can be free, that is pain well worth experiencing.

Too many times I have seen people decide to run away from this process when the purpose is to bring them into a greater level of freedom and joy.

I will be blunt honest on here this time. I am tired of seeing so many people who were once on fire with passion for God slowly fade into the background when things got too intense inside of them and when the painful process of working out scar tissue didn’t feel good. It got too uncomfortable for them.

What is the point of having a relationship with a loving, all knowing, faithful God when we are only willing to give him our scraps or a piece of our heart?  When he desires more of us, some just sit back allowing themselves to turn into an apathetic Sunday or once a month Christian. If my husband did that to me, we would have major issues. I would know that he had lost interest in loving me and might even be hiding something from me. I am no longer friends with people who have treated me in similar ways because there was no longer a healthy relationship that was growing.

God knows all of our junk. He knows all of our secrets. He knows that what we go to often creates more agony and pain. His ways are always best because he is good. He is love.

Let him work through the scar tissue.

It is worth it.

Freedom. Overflowing joy. Love reigns where fear once had a stronghold. Addictions are gone. Trauma is healed. Life in Christ is a life lived from victory!

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